Verbal Discharge

#101: Ho-Ho-Hentai Mince Pie

Merry Christmas! Here's your gift, a beautiful new podcast, with more facts about the history of mince pies than you ever wanted!

It's this year's Christmas podcast! This week, Robbie writes some cracker jokes, James has done a great deal of research into mince pies, and Jordan is getting into the festive spirit. Now all that remains is you download the blighter and shove it in your ears like a good little elf. Get on it.

#100: Review of the Year 2017 LIVE

This is it, folks. The golden, shining Episode 100. It's the Discharge Review of the Year, recorded live as part of Nottingham Comedy Festival!

With thanks to Furthest From the Sea, it's our century episode, as we look back on 2017 in all it's dead baby glory! On the show, James celebrates just how weird our old favourite George Osborne is, Robbie prepares a puppet show on the new UKIP leader, Jordan has some suggestions for Word of the Year, and Ben presents a world-exclusive look at the new Star Wars film. It's a fantastic show, and it's all yours for ear-based consumption.

#99: Middle-Aged Amnesia Odyssey

Haha you know when you run out of wine and you're like "Oh man, what I really need is a podcast. And some wine!!!". That's right, middle-aged women of Facebook, we appeal to you too now.

This week on the podcast, Ben has a new favourite genre of meme, Jordan explores the universe, and Robbie revives a dead-for-a-reason comedy character for a brand new quiz show. That's right, podcasts two weeks in a row. We spoil you lot.

If you do want to thank us, you can come along to The Cross Keys in Nottingham next Friday 10th November for our Review of the Year show, with Furthest From the Sea & Nottingham Comedy Festival.

#98: A Rollercoaster of Canadian Pony Shit

Cor, it's been a while. How have you been? How are the kids? How old are they now? Wow, they're getting big.

Yes, the podcast finally returns, as we find a very 21st century solution to not all being able to get into the same room for two months! This week, Robbie has been to Canada, Jordan has a fun story about shit, and James has not got any more time for hearing about the My Little Pony movie. Now, all that remains is for you to settle in, and hear a golden podcast of somewhat-reduced audio quality.

#97: 100% Pure Robbie from concentrate

Our podcast is much like orange juice. Perfect with your breakfast, refreshing, and containing a lengthy story about the frustrating sexual fantasies of an old woman.

Here's a really good podcast! This week, Robbie is chased around a tent by an old woman, Ben sends abuse over a PS4, and James recounts the tales of a child called Ancient Face. That and LOTS LOTS MORE. Like, fifty-odd minutes more. That's loads more. LOTS LOTS, even, you could say.

#96: Love Island Special!!!!

One island. Two winners. Like eight hundred and thirty stupid people trying to fuck each other. It's the TV show you've been sort-of confused about when your colleagues talk about it, everyone!

It's time Team Discharge familiarise themselves with the TV event of ITV2 between 9 and 10:30 on the evenings it was on. This week, James and Robbie binge Love Island, and see how closely it fits their predictions going in. Join them for a voyage of rapist, twats, and a woman who's probably Andy Cerkis covered in ping-pong balls*. That's right, ladies and mildly disinterested gentlemen, it's time for our Love Island special!

 

*This is a joke Robbie came up with immediately after finishing the show, and regrets not making, so has squeezed in here.

#95: Some Sort of Billy Joel Orang-utan Dystopia

Welcome back, friend, to your favourite place for ears.

This week, Ben solves climate change, Brexit, endangered species and NHS funding, Robbie accidentally watches tennis, and James is a detective with no time for political correctness. All this and probably slightly more. It's the Verbal Discharge podcast, ladies and gentleorangs.

#94: Cumming In Flubber: The Video Game

When the polling cards go away, the dick jokes come to play.

Last week, Britain went to the polls, and put into motion events that could last years, strengthening the political discourse and creating endless amounts of things for us to talk about. So instead, we spent an hour and a half talking about dicks and Flubber's sex life. This week, Ben has some big questions, Jordan has very few answers, Robbie has some career suggestions for Tim Farron and James has some great ideas for new video games. All this and more! More! We somehow managed to fit more in this podcast!

#93: ONE GODDAMN WEEK TO GO

Disclaimer: The following podcast contains so much politics, it contains a disclaimer warning you about how much politics it contains.

There's one week to go until the UK's general election, and we won't let you forget it. James, Robbie and Jordan discuss the highs and lows of the still-unfurling campaign, and tackle each of the five parties jostling for your vote. Plus! Robbie does his best Paxman as we attempt to find a new Podcast PM, we make some outlandish rumours about Caroline Lucas, and play some music by Tim Farron's old pop group (No, really). It also gets angry and impassioned. But can you blame us? There's only one week to go to the election...

#92: Hotel Toilet Awareness Week

We try really hard to talk about things other than the election this week, honest.

A half-strength but absolutely full-fat podcast this week, but don't let that put you off as James and Robbie venture alone. This week, one of them uses a women's toilet and watches Hotel For Dogs, whilst the other is stalked by a man with a carrier bag and celebrates Mental Health Awareness Week. It's quite a show. Quite a show.

#91: The Eurovision Referendum LIVE

This week, Verbal Discharge celebrates Europe's favourite bucket of tuneless wonder in a glorious live show as part of Derby Comedy Festival! And by that we mean Eurovision, not Nigel Farage.

Our Eurovision special comes from the Guildhall Theatre Clubrooms, as a LIVE STUDIO AUDIENCE joined us for a celebration of the best and worst of Eurovisions past. On the show, James is confused by UK geography, Jordan recovers from a mental breakdown, Robbie almost chokes to death and Ben wears a frankly remarkable piece of clothing. That you can't see because this is an audio podcast. Never mind. It's a good show. Listen to it.

You can find the assorted videos we played during the show in the 'Eurovision Referendum' playlist on our YouTube Channel. The show makes sense without them, but you may want to see them anyway.

#90: Strong, Stable, Stretched Out

Theresa May ate some chips and we strung that out into an entire podcast.

It's another podcast here. Another podcast. Here's another podcast. There's an election coming up, so we focus on the fortnight's big stories. Namely, Theresa May ate some chips. Beyond that, Robbie eats a sandwich, Jordan drives a magical musical scat bus and James starts a restaurant. And some more things. Some more strong and stable things. Enjoy it, and we'll see you at the Guildhall Theatre, Derby, next week for our Eurovision Referendum show!

#89: My First Snap Election Experience

Well it's safe to say quite a bit has happened since our last podcast. An election was called, George Osborne stood down, and a new Peppa Pig movie came out. Time for us to deal with it all.

There's a lot to tackle this week, in a show many people may describe as 'bumper'. On this week's show, Ben constructs a new political beat 'em up, James finds himself sold into slavery, and Robbie has seen another Peppa Pig movie, and is willing to let history repeat itself. That and we talk about the election. And Brexit. And George Osborne. And Jeremy Corbyn. And the election. And Theresa May. And Brexit. And Nigel Farage. And Vikings. And Brexit. One day we might get over it.

#88: W.H. Gordon's Copyright Infringement

An episode of dubious intent and questionable legality.

Verbal Discharge are dipping their toes in a whole world of fresh oceans this week. They try their hands as branch assistants at a W.H.Smiths store, stop to ponder the wider justifications for full-scale war with all manner of sovereign states, and even take a moment to infringe on all kinds of copyrights and land themselves in an inevitable heap of legal bother. Expect a Jordan, a Robbie and a James.

#87: FRENULUM.

An hour and a half of four mild-mannered men get angry about other people's work.

Verbal Discharge accidentally becomes Literary Critcharge this week, as we take on writers, poets, broadcasters and George Osbornes alike. Join us as Jordan gets trapped on a desert island, Robbie appears on another radio show, Ben learns to write, and James uncovers the shameful poetry of a certain Mr. Yiannopoulos...

#86: A Cure for Fascism

And like a golden horse in a mine of financially-struggling equiphiles, the Verbal Discharge podcast comes roaring back int your life, ready to make your ears feel like they have purpose once more.

The podcast is back, better than ever, in a decent audio quality again at long last, and fully aware we skipped Episode 85. This week, Robbie explores the eely world of A Cure for Wellness, Jordan wire-taps Donald Trump, James looks for a new centre of hate, and Ben buys you a brand-spanking new gift. All this and plenty more in the podcast critics are calling "A return to form", "Spellbinding" and "Something that makes me proud of my son for the first time ever".

You can listen to the show in the player above, in whichever podcast app you prefer, or by right-clicking here to download. Thank you very much, we'll see you soon!

#84: Paul Nuttall is on this podcast.

And he lost some close personal friends to the episode recording too.

Or at least Paul Nuttall would tell us so. On this week's show, James looks for a mystery item, Robbie finds the world's new favourite sex track and Jordan investigates collective nouns/Donald Trump's cabinet. And there's then a bit where we didn't know it was recording, though we never say "Grab her by the pussy" because we're actually half-decent people so it's all OK.

And a quick plug, our next live show is this Wednesday, the 22nd February at QUAD in Derby, please come along. We'll be your best friend.

#83: Bridget Jones's Russian Dicking Doll

It's a universally recognised truth that, when one part of your podcast starts going well, another falls spectacuarly into a phallic trap with no escape.

Hello, hi, are we well? That's good. This week, James fact-checks Bridget Jones, Robbie develops a new catchphrase, Ben leaves his ex-wife, and Jordan starts looking for wolves. All this, and probably a few other bits.

#82: Sexy Racist Rugby Robots First

Oh my god, it's a podcast, quick, someone, shoot it in the head! Or listen to it! Maybe that's more progressive!

This week, the Discharge team revolutionise a sport, stop facism, form a new political party and discuss pub toilets over the course of an hour. What have you done today? Oh, sorry mate, don't feel down, we didn't mean to say you're worthless, it's just... Look, it's OK. Just listen to the podcast, OK, it'll all be OK. Jordan, James and Robbie will do their best to cheer you up. We know it's been tough since Cheryl left, but... It'll be OK. We'll be back next week too. Don't worry about it.

#81: DJ Gerard's Alien Horse Research

Another potential interview, another celebrity blowing us off. But at least this one sent us a snarky tweet...

The Discharge boys try to recover from their monumental let-down by decidedly average discslinger DJ Fresh by all getting all four together for the first time since ever. This week, Ben does his research, Jordan does his research, James does his research and Robbie does his research. They also discuss ET's sex life, deliver some delicious alternate facts and produce and release, in full, the upcoming Gerard Butler movie Geostorm. It's enough to satisfy even the grumpiest of men called DJ Fresh.